Frequent Crier

by J. Martinez

It has been a year and six months since my cancer diagnosis. The road has been hard and at times it seems impossible to see the future. In the beginning time seemed to stop and everything in my life was just a blur passing me by. But I have learned that I need to continue moving forward. Despite the difficulties and setbacks the one thing that can not happen is remaining still.

Inertia would mean death. Not literal death but death of spirit, and that can not be allowed. Where before I forced myself to be Stoic, thinking I was being strong, I have learned that sharing my feelings and letting myself be vulnerable allows me to heal and keep my spirits up. I have learned that community is what helps me remain strong and to build my community is necessary to share, to be open, to let my emotions show so others can empathize and uplift me when I need it.

Through this journey one thing has happened, I have become a frequent crier. I allow myself to feel and cry when sadness comes, but I have learned to give the sadness a limited time to be felt and then I move on. I cry of happiness when I hear good news, when milestones are achieved, when family events happen, oh yes, I have become a frequent crier.

As the tears flow my spirit is cleansed, my soul rejoices for it is through those tears that I can be free of stagnation, the flow of life burdens moving through me and the peace that remains taking center stage.

Jafet Martinez joined Cancer Connection’s Spirit of the Written Word writing group in September 2024. He is a marketing specialist who has spent his career helping community organizations and nonprofits share their missions and stories. As a cancer patient, Jafet writes from the heart about his healing journey, the challenges and joys of everyday life, the importance of self-care, and the strength he has found in community. Through his reflections, he hopes readers feel seen, encouraged, and reminded that none of us has to walk this path alone.